“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

“He who waits on God never waits too long”

“God, grant me the Senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference”

“God is not only true, but Truth itself”

“When we know what God is, we shall be gods ourselves”

“But I always think that the best way to know God is to love many things.”

“I want to know all Gods thoughts; all the rest are just details.”

“God is an abbreviation for Goddess”

“God enters by a private door into every individual.”

“God is a thought who makes crooked all that is straight.”

“The Creator has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do”

“If God invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken Him completely by surprise.”

“Of all created comforts, God is the lender; you are the borrower, not the owner”

“One reason God created time was so that there would be a place to bury the failures of the past.”

“We regard God as an airman regards his parachute; it’s there for emergencies but he hopes he’ll never have to use it”