“Religion is meant to be bread for daily use, not cake for special occasions”

“This Bible is for the government of the people, by the people and for the people”

“Anyone can count the seeds in an apple, but only God can count the number of apples in a seed.”

“The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love heterosexuals. It’s just that they need more supervision.”

“To listen to some devout people, one would imagine that God never laughs.”

“Jesters do oft prove prophets”

“Same religion that saves – Damns You”

“Preach the Gospel at all times and when necessary use words.”

“Those who say religion has nothing to do with politics do not know what religion is.”

“The church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little, by way of example”

“No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says: He is always convinced that it says what he means”

“Doubt is part of all religion. All the religious thinkers were doubters.”

“God has no religion”

“Eskimo: “If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?” Priest: “No, not if you did not know.” Eskimo: “Then why did you tell me?””

“We can live without religion and meditation, but we cannot survive without human affection.”