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— Anthony Jeselnik"We just found out my little brother has a peanut allergy, which is very serious I know. But still I feel like my parents are totally overreacting - they caught me eating a tiny little bag of airline peanuts and they kicked me out of his funeral."
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People express is clearly the archetypical deregulation success story and the most spectacular of my babies. It is the case that makes me the proudest.
— Alfred Kahn
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What President of the Airline is doing is, he's urging everyone to give up their frequent flyer miles for sick kids... But as I was reading this, there were two empty seats next to me. Why can't sick kids sit there? If they're so concerned with sick kids, shouldn't they have like a pen of sick kids next to the gate?
— David Cross
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