"But no thoughtful man's life is uninteresting or devoid of marvels. A sincere life cannot be empty of memorable occurrences."

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Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash. (Said to President Bush at the White House Correspondents Dinner)

— Stephen Colbert