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By common consent, gray hairs are a crown of glory: the only object of respect that can never excite envy.
Sep 29, 2025
Intolerance is the ''Do Not Touch'' sign on something that cannot bear touching. We do not mind having our hair ruffled, but we will not tolerate any familiarity with the toupee which covers our baldness.
We all of us must come to terms with what and who we are, and recognize that this wisdom is not going to earn us any praise, that life is not going to pin a medal on us for recognizing and enduring our own vanity or egoism or baldness or our potbelly.
For lack of a better term, they've labeled me a sex symbol. It's flattering and it should happen to every bald, overweight guy.
You can inherit male-pattern baldness from your mother's father, but not a tendency to fight in the First World War.
Baldness that appears to be normal is a disease in Europe, almost all of them are bald, and that is because of the things they eat; while among the indigenous peoples there are no bald people, because we eat other things.
According to the doctors, I'm only suffering from a light form of premature baldness.
Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out.
This movie is a toupee made up to look like honest baldness.
I thought the Egyptians had cured baldness.
It is foolish to pluck out one's hair for sorrow, as if grief could be assuaged by baldness.
I bet the reason people are afraid of going bald is because it makes them think of the end of life. I mean, when your hair starts to thin, it must feel as if your life is being worn away ... as if you've taken a giant step in the direction of death, the last Big Consumption.
Don't tear your hair out over a woman; it'll be harder to attract the next one if you're bald.
The worst thing baldness causes is loneliness.
When others kid me about being bald, I simply tell them that the way I figure it, the good Lord only gave men so many hormones, and if others want to waste theirs on growing hair, that's up to them.
Bald as the bare mountain tops are bald, with a baldness full of grandeur.
I'm not bald. I'm just taller than my hair.
The tenderest spot in a man's make-up is sometimes the bald spot on top of his head.
The Falklands thing was a fight between two bald men over a comb.
A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.
I love bald men. Just because you've lost your fuzz don't mean you ain't a peach.
Women love a self-confident bald man.
Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man - there's your diamond in the rough.
Women's liberation will not be achieved until a woman can become paunchy and bald and still think she's attractive to the opposite sex.
If a man walks in the woods for love of them half of each day, he is in danger of being regarded as a loafer. But if he spends his days as a speculator, shearing off those woods and making the earth bald before her time, he is deemed an industrious and enterprising citizen.
There's one thing about baldness, it's neat.
A hair in the head is worth two in the brush.
In foreign countries they fear baldness. They are so rich in foreign countries, they can afford to fear all kinds of silly things.
There is more felicity on the far side of baldness than young men can possibly imagine.
It is foolish to tear one's hair in grief, as though sorrow would be made less by baldness.
Women smirk at baldness. How adorable would they find it if they began to lose their breasts in their late twenties? If both tits just shrunk up - unevenly I might add - and eventually turned into wine-cork nubs. Then it would be a different story. Then men would get the pity that they deserve. As far as I'm concerned, baldness is the male breast cancer only worse, because almost everyone gets it. True, it's not life threatening. Just social-life threatening. But in New York City, there is no difference.
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