Funny Redneck Quotes

You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.

'Jerry Springer' is just kind of the chubby, redneck version of throwing Christians to the lions.

The grand irony, however, is that Southern segregation was not brought to an end, nor redneck violence dramatically reduced, by violence.

You might be a redneck if it's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.

To me, redneck is a sense of self and a way of life.

I'm happier than a tornado in a trailer park.

You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.

If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.

He's one fry short of a Happy Meal.

I think I may have created a monster with my - I won't say act - but with my redneck pose.

If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.

He had fallen out of the ugly tree, and hit every branch.

You could start an argument in an empty house.

You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

You might be a redneck if on your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.

We live in the country. I'm a redneck. No, ha-ha. I live in L.A. County, but more in the hills. Not in the fancy kind! Trust me; whatever you do you do not want to come to my neighborhood!

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.

People look at you, and they've got just the perfect little box for you, the perfect category. Call you a redneck. Call you a hillbilly. Like those were insults.

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.

If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up.

You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.