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No dates until you're sixteen. And no boyfriends, either.' I'm not quite sure how to tell Mom, but it looks like I don't just have one boyfriend. I have two.
Sep 29, 2025
Without the proper care, there's no beauty. Without beauty, there's no boyfriend.
No boyfriend wants to see their girlfriend in a video with a big, handsome black dude feeding his fingers into her mouth, do they? But that concept is my expression, and boyfriends have to deal with that, don't they?
I hate Christmas. Everything is designed for families, romance, warmth, emotion and presents, and if you have no boyfriend, no money, your mother is going out with a missing Portuguese criminal and your friends don't want to be your friend anymore, it makes you want to emigrate to a vicious Muslim regime, where at least all the women are treated like social outcasts. Anyway, I don't care. I am going to quietly read a book all weekend and listen to classical music.
I will not sulk about having no boyfriend, but develop inner poise and authority and sense of self as woman of substance, complete without boyfriend, as best way to obtain boyfriend.
A lot of times I play a fat woman with cats who has no boyfriends. And in real life, I'm allergic to cats and I've had a boyfriend since college.
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