Pipe Smoking Quotes

The man who smokes, thinks like a sage and acts like a Samaritan.

May my last breath be drawn through a pipe, and exhaled in a jest.

Two of my favorite things are sitting on my front porch smoking a pipe of sweet hemp, and playing my Hohner harmonica.

No matter how carefully you plan your goals they will never be more than pipe dreams unless you pursue them with gusto.

I hated tobacco. I could have almost lent my support to any institution that had for its object the putting of tobacco smokers to death...I now feel that smoking in moderation is a comfortable and laudable practice, and is productive of good. There is no more harm in a pipe than in a cup of tea. You may poison yourself by drinking too much green tea, and kill yourself by eating too many beefsteaks. For my part, I consider that tobacco, in moderation, is a sweetener and equalizer of the temper.

There is no composing draught like the draught through the tube of a pipe.

A pipe is the fountain of contemplation, the source of pleasure, the companion of the wise; and the man who smokes, thinks like a philosopher and acts like a Samaritan.

Pipe-smokers spend so much time cleaning, filling and fooling with their pipes, they don't have time to get into mischief.

The believing we do something when we do nothing is the first illusion of tobacco.

There's something luxurious about having a girl light your cigarette. In fact, I got married once on account of that.

I'm glad I don't have to explain to a man from Mars why each day I set fire to dozens of little pieces of paper, and then put them in my mouth.

Good food, good sex, good digestion, good sleep: to these basic animal pleasures, man has added nothing but the good cigarette.

Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward. Next to the first one in the morning, it's the best one of all. It tasted so good that even if I had been frigid I would have pretended otherwise just to be able to smoke it.

To smoke or not to smoke: I can make of either a life-work.

I used to smoke two packs a day and I just hate being a nonsmoker.... but I will never consider myself a nonsmoker because I always find smokers the most interesting people at the table.

I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: 'Oh well,' and I went back to smoking again, and that was better.

For the first time in history, sex is more dangerous than the cigarette afterward.

You must have a cigarette. A cigarette is the perfect type of a perfect pleasure. It is exquisite, and it leaves one unsatisfied. What more can one want?

He who doth not smoke hath either known no great griefs, or refuseth himself the softest consolation, next to that which comes from heaven.

I tried to stop smoking cigarettes by telling myself I just didn't want to smoke, but I didn't believe myself

Much smoking kills live men and cures dead swine.

Yes, social friend, I love thee well, In learned doctor's spite; Thy clouds all other clouds dispel And lap me in delight.

But when I don't smoke I scarcely feel as if I'm living. I don't feel as if I'm living unless I'm killing myself.

A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.

I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.

If you can't send money, send tobacco.

Ods me I marle what pleasure or felicity they have in taking their roguish tobacco. It is good for nothing but to choke a man, and fill him full of smoke and embers.

Smoking is one of the leading causes of all statistics.

They threaten me with lung cancer, and still I smoke and smoke. If they'd only threaten me with hard work, I might stop.

A custom loathsome to the eye, hateful to the nose, harmful to the brain, dangerous to the lungs, and in the black, stinking fume thereof nearest resembling the horrible Stygian smoke of the pit that is bottomless.

I kissed my first girl and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. I haven't had time for tobacco since.

The pipe draws wisdom from the lips of the philosopher, and shuts up the mouth of the foolish; it generates a style of conversation, contemplative, thoughtful, benevolent, and unaffected.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.

Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.

A cigar has "...a fire at one end and a fool at the other."

Divine in hookas, glorious in a pipe When tipp'd with amber, mellow, rich, and ripe;... Yet thy true lovers more admire by far Thy naked beauties - give me a cigar!

I believe that pipe smoking contributes to a somewhat calm and objective judgement in all human affairs.

There are some circles in America where it seems to be more socially acceptable to carry a hand-gun than a packet of cigarettes.