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There is no strong beer, just weak men
Sep 29, 2025
Buy a man a beer, and he wastes an hour. Teach a man to brew, and he wastes a lifetime.
Beer is made by men, wine by God.
Beer's intellectual. What a shame so many idiots drink it.
In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I'm sorry, did I say 'scientists'? I meant Irish people.
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world.
I've only been in love with a beer bottle and a mirror.
When I die, I want to decompose in a barrel of porter and have it served in all the pubs in Dublin. I wonder would they know it was me?
He who loves not women, wine, and song Remains a fool his whole life long.
When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle. They're on TV!
Some people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had beer and hot dogs.
An oppressive government is more to be feared than a tiger.
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution!
No soldier can fight unless he is properly fed on beef and beer.
There cannot be good living where there is not good drinking.
I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
Good people drink good beer.
I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion.
Beer, if drank with moderation, softens the temper, cheers the spirit, and promotes health.
Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.
I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts.
I drink to make other people interesting.
When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink.
Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my scotch, I say, I'm thirsty, not dirty.
If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer.
Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar.
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today.
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; the best of life is but intoxication.
Fill with mingled cream and amber, I will drain that glass again. Such hilarious visions clamber Through the chamber of my brain — Quaintest thoughts — queerest fancies Come to life and fade away; What care I how time advances? I am drinking ale today.
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.
I think a man ought to get drunk at least twice a year just on principle, so he won't let himself get snotty about it.
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
Life, alas, is very drear. Up with the glass! Down with the beer!
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer.
The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one.
Nothing ever tasted better than a cold beer on a beautiful afternoon with nothing to look forward to than more of the same.
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.