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The beatings will continue until morale improves.
Sep 29, 2025
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.
Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed them. If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.
If hard work were such a wonderful thing, surely the rich would have kept it all to themselves.
Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
The second mouse gets the cheese!
By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
I intend to live forever. So far, so good. - T-SHIRT
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well.
Don't put off until tomorrow what you can do today.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can put off forever.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
Work hard at work worth doing.
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
Two wrongs don't make a right.
Choose a career you love and you will never have to go to work.
Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
Just be truthful - and if you can fake that, you've got it made.
Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'
In my own work, humor is necessary, for the reasons stated above, but also because forbidding your characters silliness, absurdity, irony, and vulgarity forbids them aspects of the human experience every bit as universal as sorrow.
If at first you don't succeed, try hard work.
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